Vintage Advertisements

The Guess Who 'American Woman' single release:
(Rolling Stone issue 54, March 1970) 

Pacific Gas & Electric 'Are You Ready?' album release:
(Rolling Stone issue 60, June 1970) 

I have to say, I've never associated America with poverty but to be fair, Bob Geldof wasn't around to enlighten these guys at the time.
 

Mendocino County, California land at $450-$800 per acre
Peace watches for $14.00 (available today at Dollarama)
Radio airtime for aspiring DJs at $20.00/hr ($10.00/hr after midnight):
(Rollling Stone issue 65, September 1970) 

Electric Avenue

While flipping through television channels the other day, I came across this video on Much More Music. I had forgotten how epic this track was/is. It sounds as fresh today as it did in 1983. This song needs to be revived: 

 

Vintage Advertisements

The 60s were a blur. I've just completed perusing old issues of Rolling Stone magazine from the decade on my Cover to Cover DVD archive. It's been quite fascinating to read through history as it happened; I can't help but imagine what it would have been like to come of age during such a magical era. Although I must say, as someone who doesn't partake in any illegal substances (heck, I don't even drink alcohol), I am slightly scandalized by the bi-weekly inclusion of a feature devoted solely to the positive aspects of drugs. Eat it, lick it, snort it, f*** it...can you imagine if the magazine did that today? It would inadvertently become a campaign for D.A.R.E.. No matter how hard you try, you can't Photoshop the ugly off a methhead. 

But now...onto some vintage advertisements. 

Telex 8-Track Recorder:
(Rolling Stone issue 47, November 1969) 

Globe Propaganda (coalition of album cover artistes):
(Rolling Stone issue 48, November 1969) 

Eric Andersen s/t album release:
(Rolling Stone issue 49, December 1969)

I plead ignorance in knowing who Eric Andersen is, but had to include this vintage advertisement for the cringe-worthy copy alone: "Anyone who looks as good as this, shouldn't sound as good as this." 

 

Migrate

I've always been a person with a plan. A strategy. A blueprint for matters of the heart, mind and soul. So it's unsettling where I now find myself, fighting the ebb and flow of physics and economics in my 29th year, questioning my beliefs, my future, my taste in music and men...unsettling, but also highly intriguing, for I am at a crossroads in the game of life and my choices now will forever inspire/haunt the person I am and the person I am set to become. The last time I felt this sense of urgency for change, good things happened. I feel the stars have aligned and are telling me "it's now or never". So I ask: should I remain in my hometown or move to the place where I actually feel at home? It's a superficial crises that rears its head every few years or so...the dream of relocating to the coast.

Winnipeg will forever remain in my bones. I enjoy it here but the predictability of everyday life has, in a sense, caused me to be complacent on certain things. I can't help but notice how rejuvenated creatively and spiritually I feel after returning from a trip...the excitement of new sights, sounds and tastes. Living in Winnipeg is somewhat like living the reality version of the movie 'Groundhog Day'. You can leave for a day, you can leave for a decade, and upon return will be met with the same ol', same old: sensationalized media reports of being the hard crime capital of Canada, tree building huggers protesting the demolition of every decrepit abandoned structure within the perimeter, and the faint hope that the Jets may return. Maybe. Possibly. Or not. In a way, we live in the past. My areas of choice, British Columbia or Nova Scotia, would provide, if nothing more, a change of scenery; and if nothing less, a much appreciated change of perspective.

That's not to say their magic will never fade either. I'm sure the coffee shops in Vancouver are filled with repetitive discussion concerning the rising cost of living and the drug problems plaguing the city. At the other end of the spectrum in Nova Scotia, the lack of employment opportunity cannot be ignored. But I'm evolving into a nomad. I crave change. I don't have a plan, as yet. And I don't plan on making one anytime soon. The wind will carry me home. Where I should be. Where I need to be. Wherever that is.

I Need to Stop Leading a Boring Life.

The makers of the blanket for people who don't know how to use a regular blanket are coming out with a canine version. I present to thee, the Snuggie for Dogs:

Holy shit! I can't stop watching. The dog at 1:04 is the fiercest bitch I've ever seen. Look at that pose...she's smiling with her eyes! It would be a travesty if Anna Wintour didn't put her on the cover of Vogue. If the Snuggie dogs were to ever do an infomercial with the Slap Chop guy, I think my head would explode from the awesomeness.

When I'm weary, feeling small, these 3 minute (or less) bursts of Velveeta sunshine renew my faith that there is an art to advertising. I dare anyone to watch the following commercial and not be utterly mesmerized by the Buscemi-esque delivery of some truly epic, memorable copy: 

However, for every Guernica, there is this or *shudder* this.  

Obladaisms

While waiting patiently in line to purchase toilet paper at Shoppers Drug Mart earlier this week, I was met with a revelation. A 30-something woman of average appearance (and questionable intelligence) enthusiastically informed the cashier that the items she was purchasing were in anticipation of an exciting evening spent watching her favorite show: "The Bachelorette". Upon her admission, I felt the warm vomit of my mac-n-cheese lunch arising through my throat, but managed to refrain from outwardly showing my disgust and second-hand embarrassment. I had always wondered what type of person watched that godawful program and was shocked to the core when I couldn't see any lobotomy scars. Instead I eyed her purchases. They included a large bag of Cool Ranch Doritos and a gallon of chocolate milk...the very same things I binge on while playing Mario Kart till 2:00am. How could I hate? Her love of feta was my love of gouda. Another time, another place, we might be kindred BFFs. This knowledge both nourished and destroyed me. 

I'm not a huge movie fanatic, but holy shit do the films being released soon look terrible. "Funny People" appears to be anything but; the commercial is cringe-worthy. But maybe I'm not giving it a chance based on the fact that I think Adam Sandler sucks. Then there's "Julie & Julia". When the Julie character asks her boyfriend if she's CRAZY for wanting to write a blog based on a cookbook by Julia Child, he emphatically answers "yes". I'm somewhat led to believe that this couple feels making love with the lights on is downright insane and the only ingredient in this film is vanilla. Lastly, "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra". I thought this was supposed to be based on the children's toy and not based on a movie based on ANOTHER children's toy (i.e. Transformers)? I'll resume watching the paint dry, thanks. 

I am a complete pop culture junkie and I have made the ultimate score. Rolling Stone: Cover To Cover was in the Chapters.Indigo.ca Bargain Bin. I nabbed it for a song. I'm not really sure where to begin (there's 40 years of bi-weekly issues to read through), but I plan on posting some of the more interesting things on this blog (specifically vintage advertisements and photos of Insane Clown Posse fans, which always bring the LOLs). 

The Great Manitoba Summer

Manitoba winters can be a hard pill to swallow, but our summers more than make up for it. Blue skies. Fields of gold. Barbeque. Bikini. Martini. Linguine. After my beloved steel chariot was rearended by a minivan-driving soccer mom yapping on her cell phone earlier in the week, I decided to get as far away from suburban hell as possible this weekend, hitting a hidden oasis just west of the city: Beaudry Provincial Park. Ever heard of it? Despite living here for for the duration of my feeble existence, I hadn't...until I read about it in a handy little free guide called "Great Manitoba Getaways".  

Located about 10 minutes west of Winnipeg on PR241 (Roblin), the park is a secluded paradise of curious critters (deer, garter snakes...possible escapees from Headingley Prison located across the river) and lush foliage. It's complete desertion reminded me of another beautiful park that often seems to be overlooked (LaBarriere); however, the actual ecosystem of the river-bottom forest reminded me of another place entirely - Stanley Park. Seriously, walking beneath the shady canopy amongst thick dew-tipped giant ferns brought me right back to being in my favorite city in the world, Vancouver. I've been thinking a lot about it lately...perhaps this wee slice of local heaven will tide me over for the time being.

Air Canada is A**tastic

Google "Air Canada sucks" and you get 352,000 results. Google "Air Canada is asstastic" and you get two (hopefully three after I hit 'publish'). It is my ploy for this post to not get buried in cyberspace, thus begins my rant on the most arrogant company I have ever had the displeasure of doing business with.

I've always wanted to travel to Japan but the cost has been prohibitive. One day last spring while deciding upon my next destination, I curiously checked the air fare to Narita and was surprised; it was at the lowest price I'd ever seen, so I decided to take advantage of it and book immediately. I would have been content to sit and wait for my departure date to arrive, but Air Canada's ill-conceived marketing strategy of informing people who've already booked their vacations that fares are now cheaper has left me livid. 

I completely understand that air fares fluctuate - it's rare for two individuals sitting next to each other on a plane to have paid the same amount - but last week I received an e-mail detailing the new rate for Narita (same date/flight #) at a price significantly lower than what I had paid. And this morning I received another e-mail in which the fare decreased further ($500 less than the amount I had paid in the Spring). I never knowingly or willfully signed up for these notifications. Since Air Canada doesn't plan on reimbursing me the difference or upgrading me in some fashion, I can't comprehend why I'm receiving them. Offended by this proverbial slap in the face, I wrote to the beleaguered airline to complain about this practice. They wrote:

"Sometimes when passengers see these types of specials they are able to consider inviting friends and family along with them."

So basically, Air Canada is so desperate for money that they will risk pissing off current clientele just to make a quick buck. Nice. Compare that to Westjet's model of service: they will refund/give credit to travelers who've experienced a price difference (thus ensuring repeat business). Not to mention, I will never forget how I was treated by them last year after being stranded at YVR. But most importantly, they do not bite the hand that feeds them by foolishly taunting paying customers.