Throwback

It's the summer of 1998. I'm eighteen in this picture and had just graduated high school. My time was mostly spent partying with friends, hating my call centre job, and hoping that my decision to take Advertising Art in college would lead to something more fulfilling in life.

The person in the photo with me is a very good friend that reconnected this week, after much time apart becoming the adults we are today. It made me reminisce about how it's not so much about the things you do, but the people you do them with. 

Grand-dogs

I waited at gate 12 for my return flight home. Headphones in, but they were silent. I was giving my ears a much-needed rest after listening to Adele all weekend and didn't want the emotional stigmata of her broken heart affecting the jocund greeting I planned to share with the person welcoming me home in a few hours. So instead, I stared off into space until a woman that could have passed for a "Real Housewife" of Winnipeg sat near me, all perfect hair, manicure and tanned complexion. Then I started eavesdropping. 

She was chatty with an older lady also sitting near us and very excited about her imminent trip. "I am going to London" she replied when the older lady asked of her final destination, post-Toronto pitstop. "Well, London and then Paris. My husband is taking me there. I've never been."

The "Housewife" continued a one-sided conversation of humblebragging about her amazing life, of which I was somewhat envious, when she finally extended an offer to the older lady to participate by asking if she would be visiting children or grandchildren during her travels. 

"No", she replied. "I never had children". 

"Oh", Housewife paused. "Well … I'm sure you will have grand-cats or grand-dogs."

You may think I'm making it up, but this actual conversation occurred at Winnipeg International Airport (YWG) at approximately 6:30pm on Sunday, November 1. I totally blew my cover of pretending to listen to bops while staring off into space and immediately gave the biggest side-eye towards Housewife's general direction. The older lady didn't really know what to say and finally made a joke about fur-babies while half-smiling uncomfortably. The conversation then changed to something less awkward. 

Why does everything for women filter down to having kids? This older lady may have been a pioneer in any field, could have written the world's most beautiful, soul-stirring poetry, or been a Nobel Prize winner. But none of that would have mattered as it whittled down to pity towards her for not having offspring. I see this all the time and experience it firsthand myself. I'm 35. Childless. And know my ovaries are drying up by the day. I don't give a shit. I am aware though that this subject is of more interest and concern to a lot of people rather than my accomplishments or personal interests. 

Perhaps I feel extra ranty on this subject because Christmas is coming up and I know I'm going to field these questions while meeting friends and family, or perhaps it's just the environment I'm in, which increasingly could just be planet earth, but a woman's life, purpose, and worth should not be defined by this. 

Manx Pride

Imagine my surprise when I saw this flag hanging above the mineral water pool of a spa in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan, Canada. Bonus: there was no Union Jack in sight. I'm pretty sure very, very few people could identify its origin (birthplace of the Clague surname and brothers Gibb) and am still curious as to why it was on display over more well-known nations and territories. #ManxPride

❤️

Je'taime Paris. :(

Throwback

1. No changing tramps

2. No tag

3. No fooling around of any kind will be tolerated. 

4. Only one person per tramp. 

- The Management - 

I think I'm about four-years-old in this picture. It was taken at a trampoline park in Killarney, Manitoba. This was prior to my first visit to Disneyworld and I couldn't anticipate nor imagine anything exceeding the fun I had here. My parents bought me a small trampoline - the size and type of which Jane Fonda probably used in one of her iconic fitness videos - but it was nothing like the dozen or so here. They were massive in my eyes. And extra super bouncy! 

I grew up without brothers and sisters to enjoy this revelry with, unfortunately, but my father was always game. He was a kid at heart, attempting to defy gravity along with me. Excursions to the trampoline park eventually became excursions to the arcade; travelling to Disneyworld eventually became travelling THE world. My life is rich with extraordinary experiences and cherished memories because of this man. He was "Super Dad". 

I miss him so much. 

Your Occasional Monty

Monty and a teapot version of Monty (October 2015): 

If there is such a thing as a "Cute Olympics" then I am throwing my wee guy in the ring. Look at that face! He would bring home the gold. 

November Book Recommendations

Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear
Written by Elizabeth Gilbert

I've reached a point in life and career where my confidence and trust in instinct guides everything I do. Experience sharpens the blade. It has taken many (many) years of failure and self-doubt to reach this stage of nirvana though. I wish I had taken the time to read a book like this when I was first starting out and constantly comparing myself to others; Elizabeth Gilbert's advice to create just for the sake of self purpose (not wealth, prestige or any other ego-stroking distraction) is truly what it's all about. The only part of this book I didn't like was when the author talked about creative pursuits not mattering as much as, say, being a health care provider or accountant. I argue: art, whether through written word, imagery or song, has the ability to educate, influence and touch the soul in a way that is incomparable … and invaluable to life. 

Favorite line: "Most of all, though, he asked his students to be brave. Without Bravery, he instructed, they would never be able to realize the vaulting scope of their own capacities. Without bravery, they would never know the world as richly as it longs to be known. Without bravery, their lives would remain small – far smaller than they probably wanted their lives to be."

---

Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns)
Written by Mindy Kaling

Whether describing embarrassing incidents from her childhood, sharing insight gained after suffering self-esteem issues during adolescence, or writing about her curious experiences post-achieving fame and success, Mindy Kaling speaks with a relatable, engaging voice that I felt was somewhat more sophisticated than some of her peers. The book is part memoir, part sharing of knowledge gained through living an exceptional life that all started with simply believing in one's self and working hard to actualize ambition. 

Favourite line: "Getting professionally beautified was all that I dreamed about doing when I was an asexual-looking little kid. That's because my parents dressed both my brother and me according to roughly exactly the same aesthetic: Bert from Ernie and Bert."

---

Yes, Please
Written by Amy Poehler

A friend of mine recommended this book, describing it as a memoir by a strong, funny female that I would probably appreciate. I admit to being somewhat indifferent to Amy Poehler and most SNL alumni, skimming over a portion of the copy relating specifically to this and her early improv days. However, her advice on achieving and maintaining success was entertaining and relevant to any profession. Success is never about luck, it's about extremely hard work, and it's refreshing to hear someone be honest about that.  

Favorite line: "Decide what your currency is early. Let go of what you will never have."

Chicago Vignette no.5

After taking an architectural boat tour of Chicago: 

"I cannot believe how beautiful the architecture is here. Wow! Just like you said, Deb, everything feels larger-than-life. The entire city is a work of art."

After sharing some photos I'd taken of Chicago:

"Wow, Deb! I love your photography. You have an eye for capturing things in a way that others don't see. You're so artistic … I wish I had that talent."

After visiting The Art Institute of Chicago: 

"This was one of THE greatest days of my life, Deb. Wow! I can't believe I was in the presence of so many great, historic paintings. I think I'm going to come back tomorrow. This is way more interesting than looking at buildings all day. These are actual masterpieces. There's so much to explore. I went through every gallery … except for photography. That's not real art."

😐

Chicago Vignette no.4

Early in the a.m., I headed north of my hotel to Oak Street Beach, an actual proper beach on the shores of Lake Michigan in downtown Chicago. All finely milled sand and ambient skyline views, it was a quiet, scenic spot at this hour to escape from one's thoughts or, as I had chosen, meditate further on their meaning while taking in the symphony of the streets. 

Chicago Vignette no.3

Chicago has a number of restaurants that, bizarrely, cater to those who seek rude service and like to be insulted by complete strangers. I discovered this inadvertently the last time I was in the city and found a nice (or so I assumed) 50s-style diner to have supper at. Dining solo, I was completely unaware that Ed Debevics' "theme" was to be complete jerks to their patrons and watched in horror as those around me were singled out to be mocked in front of the entire restaurant. Thankfully, my waiter took pity on me sitting by my lonesome and made a point to let me eat my cheeseburger in peace. Big tip. BIIIIIIIIG tip. 

So why did I return during this trip to the Windy City? Well, I did recall that my cheeseburger and malt were really, really tasty. And also, my friend hates crude behaviour, fast food served with poodle skirts, and places where young children run rampant. This would be payback for all of the strange men she's tried setting me up with over the years that I've known her. 

Thankfully, she was so excited to be in Chicago (and so attracted to our waiter, "Thumper") that she had a great time. The singing, the dancing, the throwing of napkins in our faces and insults about our home and native land, it was a night not to be forgotten. Especially since it was, as we discovered, Ed Debevics last. Their doors closed the following night. No joke.